When Fat is A State of Mind

Tuesday, November 16, 2010

What Happens When Reality and Expectation Collide

I will get to Part 2 I promise but for the last week my mind has been bubbling away, I've been digesting, processing, mulling and generally trying to make sense of that which has no logical explanation.

When we become parents whether consciously or subconsciously we construct a reality in which we envisage our children, who they will become, how they will shape their lives.  We invest our hopes, dreams and aspirations into our childrens futures.  We gently guide and shape our children, we nuture their spirits, give them the tools to birth their dreams, provide comfort as they learn the lessons brought forth as they unfold their wings ready to soar.

As a Mother our natural instinct is to protect our babies but what do we do when their biggest threat comes from within.  Or is their biggest threat the weight of expectation? 

How much of our parenting is actually a reflection of our ego?  We all like to think that our children are the smartest, sportiest, wittiest, divine little pieces of ourselves so what happens when that reflection is skewed away from our projections?

A selfless act as a parent is acceptance.  Not only seeing but celebrating the people our children are, the potential that they carry and the unique qualities that enrich our lives.

Our role as parents is to minimise the harm, maximise the opportunity and impart our lessons learnt with enough freedom to allow them to interpret their own lessons.

Today my son gave me a gift.  He is at an age where he enjoys role playing so today he was imagining what it would be like to be Ben 10, he said "I wish I could turn like Ben 10", then he turned to me and smiled and said "No I don't I like being me" and you know what I like him being him too because being him is pretty bloody fabulous.

We offer up our love unconditionally but sometimes we need to acknowlege that our expectations are insignificant when weighed up against the wonder that is the reality of their being.

1 comment:

Michelle Twin Mum said...

Unconditional love is an amazing thing. I so want to protect my kids but know I have to let them live their lives. Mich x