A little while ago I was going through a particularly difficult time with one of my children and I found myself careering towards rock bottom, looking back it was self indulgent crap but sometimes we just need to wallow as we adjust.
In truth I just shut down tight. I locked everyone out and just retreated into my shell to lick my wounds and recharge that emotional battery so that I could keep going. I was totally selfish but you know that was OK because it wasn't about what anyone needed me to be but what I was capable of being. So here I am having my own private pity party and I was searching. Searching for answers, trying to make sense of where I was and what I needed to do to move forward and I stumbled across the Blog of Kelle Hampton, Enjoying the Small Things . Now I'm never going to have the whole happy happy joy joy thing going on, there's just too much dark in me, I mean isn't black slimming? But whilst I'm not going to have that glass overflowing reading this blog taught me that it isn't about what's in the glass because that changes from moment to moment - it's the glass that's important and if that glass isn't doing it for you any more - CHANGE IT!!!! Reading this blog refocused me, it open that corner in my mind that said anything is possible. Continuing to read it actually made me start to actually believe that anything is possible. Now I don't "know" Kelle Hampton and probably never will but I will forever owe her a debt of gratitude for just opening me up to the possibilities and grasping the concept that will change them to probabilities. As fate is wont to weave her magic spell I came across this post today and the quotation This post has a quotation from Natalie Goldberg that is very apt but the sentence that is burnt into my brain is "If you are not afraid of the voices inside you, you will not fear the critics outside you"